Better Late than never.

I meant to post this a while, it is my nature experiment. I really did like it, and enjoyed what I wrote. So, here it is:

         I hate bugs. I hate dirt. I hate itchy plants. I hate being too cold or too hot and I hate rain. I would not go as far as saying I hate nature, but I certainly dislike a lot of the things that come along with it. Initially, I thought Emerson was crazy. “Man cannot be happy and strong until he lives with nature in the present, above time”. I could think of plenty of moments in my life when I was genuinely happy that did not involve a rustic kind of nature. For example, I am always happy when I play piano, or sing. I am happy when I read a good book. I am happy when I am spending time with my friends or family. I am happy when the attractive boy in my dorm acknowledges my presence, and I certainly know I am happy when I buy a new pair of shoes. 

-Mom Knows Best-

“Your happiness shouldn’t be dependent on anyone or anything, Kaleigh” my mom nagged through the other end of the phone line.

Mom really does know best. I had heard different variations of that saying before, but never really took it to heart. For as long as I can remember, my happiness had always depended on other people: parents, friends, or boyfriends. If I disappointed them, or was not good enough for them, then I was not happy. The more I thought about what my mom said, the more I realized that maybe I did not really know what true, genuine happiness was; maybe I had not felt that in a long time; maybe I had never felt it at all. That was a scary thought. 

-Rainy Days and Rain Boots-

                                       

As I drove out to French Creek State Park on that rainy Monday evening with my rain boots in the passenger seat and bad attitude, I thought more about this idea of personal happiness versus nature. I was certain that I was going to be cold, wet, miserable and alone when I ventured off into nature. Where is the happiness in that? I pulled into the parking lot, and naturally on a rainy Labor Day, was the only person there. Tucking my jeans into my rain boots, I found the nearest clearing and entered into the miles of trees which stood in front of me. At that moment, I decided I may as well make the most of this.

-Nature vs. Happiness-

Walking out of the same wooded area two hours later, I still hated bugs. I still hated dirt, and also mud. I still hated itchy plants. I hated being too cold, and I hated the rain. I did not however, think Emerson was crazy anymore. Sitting in my car still soaked with rain water, I looked over the notes I had taken while in the woods, and began thinking about the task thrown at our class, “Explain how and why happiness can be found and felt by experiencing nature and solitude”. I have come to my own conclusion that one’s happiness being directly related to nature all depends on the person. For some, happiness may come directly from seeing a beautiful flower, or having the fresh breeze blow through one’s hair, or rolling around in the dirt. For myself, I found that my happiness came more from being completely secluded from the human population and technology, not necessarily  from being with the trees and the bugs. During those two hours, I was able to reflect on my life, and emotions and thoughts I had been dealing with in a private setting. It was just me, myself, and I There were no distractions from cell phones, or friends, or parents, or teachers, or the internet. As I though more about this concept of being alone, I finally understood what my mom was trying to convey to me on the phone. It was not necessarily nature that made me happy, it was the realizations I was able to come to when spending time in solitude.